1. When you first bought your house, you lived in the country. Now that
same house is part of the city.
2. You can't get anything repaired
because "they stopped making those parts years ago."
3. The swing set in the backyard has
sprouted roots.
4. The plumber's phone is on your speed
dial.
5. Your phone number is on your plumber's
speed dial.
6. All the children's rooms are now guest
bedrooms.
7. You haven't visited the other half of
the house in six months.
8. You have to move the furniture to see
the carpet's original color.
9. Your bathroom is decorated in avocado
green -- from the first time it was in style.
10. You can't make any improvements to
the exterior of your home without getting approval from the "Board of
Historic Monuments."